It was another crazy day at work. So many meetings and so little accomplished when there is so much to do. I had to settle for yet another unfinished task when I left for dance. When we got home, we ate dinner in front of the TV, watching Penn State wrestling. You always know who is going to win, but somehow it’s entertaining anyway. By the time that was over, I was exhausted. I simply cannot keep up.
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January 15
I have been absolutely exhausted. Every time I start doing one thing, I get pulled into something else. Everything feels unfinished and chaotic. So when the kids started fighting about Kraft mac and cheese while I was trying to finish two other things at work, I kind of gave up on life. I tried so hard to solve the problem, but Robin wouldn’t talk to me except to say, “I don’t care” and Christina wouldn’t listen to me without interrupting me to say, “OK!” So by the time I got to dance, I was done. I was so done that I turned to the only person I could think of: ChatGPT. It recommended dinner out at Carrabba’s, and don’t you know, it was a good decision. It wasn’t perfect, but I did leave a little happier, if only utterly exhausted. What a day. I’m ready for bed.
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January 14
I’m not sure what it is, but I’m a little melancholy today. It hit me kind of suddenly and out of nowhere on my drive home from picking Christina up at dance. I know exactly where, too. Just before Wal-Mart on the corner near our house. I just feel kind of empty. Like walking in a crusty desert that stretches for miles and miles with no one and nothing around. A little sad, a little lonely, a little nostalgic. It’s not really uncomfortable. But it’s something I haven’t felt in quite a while. Maybe sleep will smooth the edges a little. Or maybe fray them. That’s beautiful too.
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January 13
I’m really enjoying my new job. Like, a lot. I haven’t even officially started and I’ve accomplished so much. And it’s been fun! Work? Fun? Who expected that? Outside of work, I’ve had to put my running shoes on the shelf for a few weeks, which has been difficult. I have a mild piriformis strain, which comes from overtraining and under-strengthening. I’m hoping some stretching and quad strengthening will help it heal quickly so I can get back to it. I am so afraid that if I get out of the habit of running, I will never get back into it, but I have to trust myself because if I push too hard I won’t even have the option of pushing. In the meantime, I guess I’m going to have to spruce up my bike and see how badly the kids have treated it. Hopefully that is low impact enough that it doesn’t aggravate anything but keeps me active. And also that I don’t get bored with it too quickly.
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January 12
I ate a quarter pounder with cheese and fries in my car today as if I hadn’t eaten anything in days. You know the sound cartoons make when they’re scarfing food? That was me, and I was unashamed as I did it. It was salty af and the little bits of onions kept falling off of it, but it was exactly what I wanted in that moment. Even though I wolfed it down in less than 2 1/2 minutes, I savored every bite. I don’t know what it is about McDonald’s, but for me it is the ultimate comfort food. It definitely was one of the higher points in my day.
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January 11
This is my latest knitting obsession. I did stop a couple times today and managed to do laundry and go food shopping. The girls and I also went to the gym – they played volleyball and I played basketball. I had very low expectations for my basketball abilities, but I surprised myself and made a decent number of shots. Probably missed more than I made, but made a lot that I never thought I could. And I worked up a sweat! I might need to do it more often. Probably good to switch it up from running once in a while. I picked the running pace up too hard too fast and now I’ve got this little annoying injury that feels like not enough to stop running, but enough that I probably should stop running, at least for a little while. I’m just afraid that if I stop, I won’t start back up. And I’ve come too far for that.
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January 10
There are no filters on this picture. The sky was that blue. It was 80 degrees today, so we decided to go to the beach. Christina dunked her head in the water, which is impressive because the water temperature is 61. We went as the sun was going down and the temperature dropped quickly, so we didn’t stay long, but it was beautiful. It always feels good to see sky.
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January 9
I have really been enjoying my new job, which really hasn’t started yet, but I’ve had time to get going since my other work is pretty much wrapped up. I hope the upcoming class goes well – I am making a lot of changes. Also today I started knitting a new blanket for the living room. We do not speak of what happened to the other one. Robin knows. This project should keep me busy for a while. And last, what the heck does this dog want? He does this every night and we cannot figure it out. He pants, he nudges, he paces, but he won’t go out, he just ate, has water, wriggles away when we try to pet him… I so wish he could talk sometimes because I’d love to give him what he wants!
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January 8
Robin tested positive for flu type A and strep throat today. She got the strep from me and the flu from the friend we went to the arcade with last weekend. Poor kid! She’s holding up pretty well considering. I’m trying my best to believe that I won’t get the flu from her, but I guess it would be fair turnaround.
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January 7
Robin stayed home from school today with a fever. Seems she may have caught whatever I had last week. I’ve also apparently developed a mild running injury from overtraining. It is going to take a monumental effort to back off and rest it, but I’m going to have to try anyway. I also have some stretches and strengthening exercises to try, so hopefully it won’t set me back much, if at all. I completed a Saturday New York Times crossword puzzle today with only three errors, which is pretty incredible. Next I tackle my first Sunday puzzle – a feat I have only ever failed so miserably that I vowed never to try again. I’m back now, though, nerdier than ever. So we’ll see.
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January 6
I was a little lethargic today. Too much cancer. A friend is facing chemo and a bleak diagnosis and Siggi found out her dear Pinchazo has a large mass in his throat. I wish I could do more than say, “I love you.” It just doesn’t feel like enough. Because it isn’t.
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January 5
Back to work for real today. Got up early for a run and a shower, which I haven’t had to do for weeks. I managed to get ahead of my work over the break, so I had time today to prepare to lead my first training class in a couple weeks. Christina went back to dance tonight and I watched “Stranger Things” on my iPad in the car. Aunt Cathrine and Uncle Bob sent this awesome hat for Christmas, and we can’t decide who wears it best. I’m partial to myself, myself. It came with some other beach accessories, which means of course that we need to go to the beach! Soon!
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January 4
We put away all the Christmas decorations today. It’s always a little sad doing that. But the living room doubled in size. The girls and I also went to Chili’s for lunch, and then after dinner Billy beat us at Phase 10. I don’t really want to go back to real life tomorrow. It’s been a good Christmas. It’s hard to let it end.
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January 3
Robin had so much fun at Leaderboard yesterday that we went back today with her friend. I’m always happy to get Robin out of the house. She also got temporary tattoo pens and has been happily drawing all over her body all afternoon. I am trying hard not to show my age and look as dismayed as I feel looking at it. At least she’s not hurting herself. Also Christina had an all day dance rehearsal and finished watching “Stranger Things” without me when she got home. So now I guess I have to start over.
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January 2
We’ve been watching “Stranger Things” like there’s no tomorrow. But we took a break today to go to Leaderboard, which was a ton of fun. It’s an arcade and pizzeria, but it’s all vintage arcades. They have a Nintendo console where you can play the original Mario Brothers, there is Q-Bert, Galaga, walls of pinball machines, air hockey, pretty much anything from the 80s or 90s that you can think of. It was so fun. And then we went out to the Melting Pot for Christina’s birthday. It was a busy but fun day. I am so exhausted now!
Year in Photos 