I was so grateful to Billy for cooking dinner tonight. Robin had cavities filled this afternoon. It cost $242 and she still needs two more done. She has seven more in development. They offered a treatment that can reverse them, but it’s $100 per site and it’s not covered by insurance. This just isn’t acceptable anymore. I’m tired of life without consequences. So… from now on, we charge her 30 minutes of phone time for every cavity. I sincerely hope this helps it sink in. I’m exhausted from the strain of not knowing what to do all the time. Every decision feels so hard.
Tag: dog
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September 12
We have been infested with tiny flying insects that only exist to annoy the crap out of every living soul around them. There was some horrific situation in the kids’ bathroom garbage can a couple weeks ago, and I feel certain that was the origin. I made the mistake of opening the lid and unleashed hundreds of them, plus the worst thing I have ever smelled in my life. It smelled like rancid vomit that had been sitting in a trash can for a month and a half. And then I made the next mistake and looked under their bathroom sink, and I won’t describe what I saw there except that apparently this is where you throw human waste when something is living in your garbage can. Anyway. Now we have little flying bugs everywhere and I hate them. I had to throw away my beautiful flowers because the bugs loved them more than I did. We will prevail. I hope.
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September 2
Today was a little better than yesterday. We made homemade pizza for dinner. Robin decided to make a calzone instead, and it came out of the oven looking like a Rolling Stones album cover. She didn’t see it. Girl has no imagination.
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August 27
We told the kids about Jackson at dinner. It was very hard. Robin had an especially hard time. But he had a pretty good day today, so maybe it’s not as imminent as we thought. He had ice cream for the first time and loved it.
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August 20
Our old boy is really showing his age lately. It’s hard to see him now compared to even a year or two ago. There’s just a little over a week until his 15th birthday. He still likes to bark at the lawnmower and will trot towards a squirrel if he happens to see one. He loves cuddles, which for him is standing next to us while we scratch his shoulders and neck. And he still refuses to look at me if I point a camera at him.
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August 15
Billy and I had a date night at Java Game Haus. We played the Harry Potter game. It’s been a long time, but it was fun. It’s a little sad that we both started falling asleep at the table, pretty much exactly at 9pm. Other than that, we had pancakes and eggs for dinner, and they were REALLY good pancakes. I need to save this recipe. I spent the morning redoing most of the patio work I did the first two weeks. I thought I’d finish that today, but there is another day’s worth to do tomorrow. This is the neverending patio.
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August 3
It hit me around 8:30 – a wave of inexplicable sadness. It took me a while to remember that Mom died 12 years ago today. I think it hurts more now than it did then – not the same raging, overwhelming depression I felt then, but a steadily growing lump of guilt and regret that is so overwhelming that my only option is to ignore it. It’s surprising to see how much energy ignorance costs.
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July 20
Busy day with cleaners coming, AC maintenance, and work. We played Mount Cleverest after dinner, which was fun. Even Robin played without any pleading necessary. We haven’t had a game night in a while. The kids need something to do. They are so bored.
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July 14
Slowly making my way through all the Yellowstone photos. All the editing is done, now it’s just captioning, and then printing and putting together a scrapbook. This may very well take me the rest of the year to complete. It’s ok. I can think of worse ways to spend my time.
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July 7
Spent the evening working on vacation photos. I’m learning a lot about Photoshop, but I know I still have a lot to learn. I hope the photos look as good printed as they look on my computer screen. I hate the look of an obviously retouched photo. Getting close to being done – just 13 left to go.
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July 2
I spent the day working on my site design at work. Every time I do something, I think of a better way to do it and then I have to do it all over again. I think now I’ve got a good system, though, so I just need to build it. Luckily I’ve also developed the content already, so all I really have to do is transfer it to a different format. More work now, but much easier to update later. I’m really proud of the work I’ve been doing. I can’t wait to see it all come together. We had some good conversation at dinner, talking about Greek mythology and its Roman counterparts and why the compass always points north even when we don’t. And then I worked on more photo editing. I am now up to Wednesday. I’m getting a little tired of photo editing, but I can’t stop now, midway through. I must persist!
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June 25
Today I drafted formal procedures for the new training program I developed this year. I had a little help from artificial intelligence, I admit, but it had to get done by Monday, so a little cheating was necessary. Tomorrow I will work on building the documentation template to use as evidence of control effectiveness. It’s a little nerdy that I enjoy this. Otherwise today I grilled cheeseburgers about 12 seconds before a thunderstorm, worked on a Yellowstone jigsaw puzzle, edited vacation photos, and read more of my book. It is after 11pm, which means yet again I am not going to want to get up in the morning to go running. I really need to get out of this pattern because running is important to me. But so is sleep. And so good night.
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June 23
It was a pretty typical day. I managed to take care of some tasks that have been sitting on my list a while – getting Robin registered for high school, getting the kids enrolled in their respective camps, scheduling car maintenance and doctor’s appointments, rescheduling the cleaners… I still have more to do. But we played Yahtzee after dinner and I started editing vacation photos. I’ll get to the bills soon.
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June 12
I think we’re all set for our trip tomorrow. Took Christina to dance and it was fucking hot in the car. Thank goodness it’s only a 45-minute class. We had Renna’s white pizza for dinner, which is always a treat. I think Jackson suspects something.
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May 29
We played the National Parks board game, which I thoroughly enjoyed even though I lost. Even Robin played without pouting. It was nice to do something together as a family that we don’t normally do. We haven’t done anything like that in a long time. Too many other things going on. Christina beat us all very handily. Guess she will be our tour guide at Yellowstone.
